Dear Peanut – 1 Year

Sweet girl,

It’s taken your mommy a while to write this… I think partly because maybe I subconsciously felt that when I wrote this post, it would make it official that I have a one year old. That it would make it official that you’re no longer a baby. Time has totally flown by. It seems like just yesterday I was sitting in the hospital room with you in my arms waiting to be released and head home to this adventure as a family of three.

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And now you’re a year old. You’re a sweet, funny, spirited, loving and smart little girl. You continually make me laugh with your silly antics, and I still find myself just looking at you in awe. I am so so so blessed to be your mama, little one.

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It’s so much fun for your daddy and I to teach you new “tricks”. You’re learning so fast these days, and you surprise us all the time with what you now do or say. Animal noises are a favorite of ours – and yours. You’re still holding back on saying “mama” or “dada” with purpose, but the look in your little blue eyes makes me think you are just making us wait for the fun of it.

You love giving kisses, and you’ve started to blow kisses as well. It may be more like squishing your sweet little face with your hand, but you can see those eyes just shining and I feel those kisses right in the depths of my heart.

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You know have an opinion and an agenda of your own, and as challenging as it can be, part of me is glad you’re so determined and know what you want. Keep that, sweet girl. I hope I can teach you to learn when to bend, but I hope you never lose that conviction or confidence in what you want. I love that you want to try to do things on your own… whether it’s put the bow back in your hair (honestly though, I wish you’d just leave them there to begin with), or put on your shoes by yourself. I will try my best to plan ahead to allow you the time you need to do those things rather than rushing us all out the door and doing those things for you.

As you’ve turned one, I have thought back to that tiny little newborn you were, and I miss her. But I love discovering the new little girl you are becoming. I know in a year, I’ll be looking back the same way at you as a one year old and missing the wild & crazy baby hair, the squeals and squeaks and coos that stood in the place of words you didn’t quite know what to say. I’ll miss the one-year-old you.. but I’m sure I’ll also be amazed by the two-year-old you’ve become.

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Sweet girl, thank you for always loving me, even on the days I may feel like a mommy failure. Thank you for always reminding me that blog posts, cleaning, and to-do lists can wait, and that reading “Where’s Spot” for the 8th time is so much more important. Thank you for letting me spend the last moments of your day with you before you drift off to dream. Thank you for bringing a smile to my face. Thank you for challenging me to grow my patience. Thank you for the kisses.

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Thank you for pushing me to think about what it means to be a good person, and then pushing me even further to understand those qualities well enough to try to teach them to you.

Peanut, thank you for being my greatest achievement and the light of our lives. Thank you for letting me be your mama. I love you, sweet girl!

I want to hear from you!

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