Part of me feels like “Here I go again….” and that I shouldn’t try to start my blog again after letting it trail off before. But…….. isn’t it better to have an “again” than nothing at all? Take that, self-doubt!
That being said, I have started a book club/discussion at my day job based on Sheryl Sandberg’s “Lean In: Women, work and the will to lead” I am only at the very beginning so far (through the introduction and chapter 1), and so I think I will reserve any serious thoughts/reactions until I can get into more of the “meat” of the book. But one initial take-away was how much I really started to think about my own personal answer to the question she poses on page 25:
“What would you do if you weren’t afraid?”
Well, Sheryl, where do I even start with that? Talk about lowering the boom. Guess I wasn’t quite expecting a gut-check moment in the first few pages. I did really start to think about it though, and I kept having this feeling that I can and should be doing more with b.marie.photography (this is a constant pull), and that I don’t necessarily share much of myself through my little business. Sure, I have my Instagram feed connected to the Facebook page, so glimpses of my daily life are there, but I am not really sharing in a meaningful way.
I want to photograph young people who are motivated, excited, and maybe a little nervous about the next step as they prepare to celebrate the monumental accomplishment of graduating. I have been there, and continually work with students in that place in my day job.
I want to photograph a newly engaged couple as they just melt into each other – whether in serious contentment, or a fit of hysterical laughter. I’ve been there and done both, and every time I look at the gorgeous images Korie created for us, I am right back there in that place. I am right there hearing Max say something off the wall to make me laugh (remind me to tell that gem of a story at some point!). I want to help provide sweet couples with photos that spur their own happy flashbacks.
I want to photograph teeny tiny brand new babies. I want to feel their sweet soft skin, and breathe in that sweet baby smell. I want to let that new baby’s parents know that I’m a close 3rd in line when it comes to the people who feel the most strongly about how beautiful their amazing gift from God is. I was so incredibly blessed to be able to take photos of my own little one as she so peacefully slept through most of her first days, and I just couldn’t get enough.
I want to photograph sweet families who are not perfect, but are perfect for each other. I want to run and play with kids and get that image of a little crinkly-nose laugh for a mother who can’t get enough of that unique part of her precious child. I want to give people the experience, memories, and photographs that I would love to have hanging on my walls with my own little family featured.
SO – if I am wanting to do those things that mean so much to me, why I am not sharing about the things, people, and experiences that mean so much to me? I don’t have a good answer for that. Other than I have decided it’s going to change.
Back to Sheryl and her gut-check: I feel like I have failed with my blog in the past. I tell myself it’s going to be different, and I’m really going to be consistent, and then life happens. The slow season happens. I think I’ve “failed” before because I looked at it solely as a place to post glimpses at my wonderful photography family (yes – I feel like my clients are my family). So when I was crazy busy with my full time job and booked fewer sessions, I just didn’t post anything. That thinking is going out the window! My photography is a big part of my life, and my life is a big part of my photography, so both will be fair game for posts on this little corner of the internet.
Some initial ideas/thoughts on what I see on the blog in the future:
- posting photo session lovelies – obviously
- thoughts on mommyhood
- book & movie reviews – because clearly, I have an expert opinion on both. Ha.
- things I’m loving at the moment
- some sort of recurring topic/theme (like a “best of”, “highs/lows”, “randoms” type post)
- whatever else strikes my fancy (yes, I said “strikes my fancy” – I’m secretly 90 years old, for crying out loud.)
Sheryl, thanks for the gut check. And I hope you don’t mind me
blaming crediting you as the catalyst for putting the random, not-so-pretty, all together lovely, and personal pieces of me and my business out there for the world to judge see. I’m going for it and embracing the fear.
(Random sidenote – I am still searching for the blog design that feels “right” to me and my brand, but I pushed back against myself when I started to put off restarting the blog due to the search for the most “me” design I can find. No excuses allowed! So if anyone has suggestions on where to look for some amazing WordPress templates, let me know in the comments!!!)